JoeCanuck

Vintage Review – LCV Recon Sled!

The Highs:
1.   Great figure integration
2.   Interesting design
3.   Inexpensive for a classic vehicle

The Lows:
1.   Design may be TOO interesting for some
2.   Periscope is easy to lose
3.   Minimal armament

The Verdict:
A nice piece for the price, if you don’t find it too ridiculous.

There are plenty of Joe vehicles out there that are based in reality, or heavily influenced by real military hardware.  The SkyStriker, Rattler, and even the Flagg are obviously based on real designs and real military hardware.  Sometimes however the Joe designers go a bit crazy and give us a vehicle that has absolutely NO basis in reality.  Stuff like the Mobile Command Center, Buzz Boar, the D.E.M.O.N, and even the new Ice Cutter have next to no basis in reality, yet we have them.  Reading the list above can make you raise your eyebrows because obviously some of these oddballs have been much more successful than others.  The LCV (Low Crawl Vehicle) Recon Sled is another one of those oddities, but, for me at least, this one works!



The LCV is a small, motorcycle-like vehicle decorated in a military-looking green, tan and dark purple color scheme.  (Trust me, the purple works well).  It consists of two sections held together by a seat.  The front section has an angular canopy with a periscope on it, the actual cockpit, two things that look like guns on the sides (the blueprints say they’re targeting sensors), headlights, and a somewhat odd front wheel section.  There are 5 total front wheels: one front and center, and then four more set in two sections behind it.  While this is an odd setup for front wheels, it WOULD allow the LCV better traction over rough terrain.  The vehicle is jointed in the middle, allowing for some up-and-down movement.




The rear section of the LCV features a traditional tire, the engine, and a small gun.  While it would appear that the engine controls only the rear tire (which is a less than ideal setup for off road traction) the thick midsection of the LCV could contain a chain drive to the front wheels for added power and off road ability.  The gun, though small, can rotate not quite 180 degrees.  While it will face directly to the rear, the gun will only rotate to about a 40 degree angle in the front.  So, the LCV can shoot behind it, but not in front unless the threat is above it.  Honestly, the gun is so small that I thought it was an exhaust pipe at first, but the blueprints describe it as a 9mm autocannon.  9mm may make an ok handgun (I prefer .45), but I’m not too fond of it as vehicle armament.



One of the reasons I like the LCV is the excellent driver integration, and the fact that Joes can ride this vehicle two ways: either upright like a traditional motorcycle/atv or lying down.  Sitting up, the LCV has footpegs for its rider (but not really handlebars).  In the lying down position the LCV’s rider would make the whole setup have a lower profile, and would navigate primarily by the vehicle’s sensors and the periscope.  Lying down, there’s holes on either side for the rider’s hands, pads for his knees, and holes in the rear panels for the figure’s feet.  They really thought out the design here, which impresses me.  There are a heck of a lot of Joe vehicles that require you to play GI Joe Twister to get the figures in them.  If not designed properly, the LCV could have been a pain to get a figure to stay on…instead, it’s one of the best Joe vehicles out there as far as figure integration goes.  Even 25th style figures fit with no problem! 





If you want an LCV, you don’t have to spend a lot of dough.  They run $10-20 complete, so there’s a minimal investment for the good old vehicle.  I can understand why some Joe enthusiasts would not be fans of this particular vehicle, but I’m one.  The only glaring negative I can see with it is the lack of forward-facing firepower.  Of course because this is a RECON Sled, its primary role would be to stealthily scout out enemy positions…so hopefully, the only time it would need to use that gun is if it was detected, in which case the fact that the gun faces to the rear would probably be an advantage!

Review – PoC Ice Cutter!


The Highs:

1.  It doesn’t suck as much as the Mole Pod.
2.  Having trouble here.
3.  Yeah, that’s pretty much it.


The Lows:

1.  It sucks almost as much as the Mole Pod.
2.  Strange color and design choices.
3.  Gun barrels could be fragile.


The Verdict:

It doesn’t suck as much as the Mole Pod, but it’s pretty damn close.


Every now and then, Hasbro releases a Joe vehicle that makes you shake your head and say, WHAT the HELL were you guys THINKING???  Be it poor design, poor playability, odd color choices, or a combination of the above, sometimes Joe vehicles are released that just kinda suck.  The Ice Cutter is one of these.  Longtime readers of my reviews know that one of the vehicles I hate the most is the Rise of Cobra Mole Pod.  I find it the perfect storm of poor design, playability, and detail.  Well, the Ice Cutter isn’t quite as bad as the Mole Pod, but it does come close.



The Ice Cutter is a small, one seater vehicle that consists of small fuselage with a small blade/guard on the front.  On the sides are devices that resemble a cross between a tank tread and a chainsaw blade.  There’s a windshield wiper on the canopy, and a decently sized double-barreled cannon positioned on top of the vehicle, behind the cockpit.  At the rear of the vehicle sits a single large tire for propulsion.  The overall design isn’t terrible, and at first glance the vehicle has potential.  So what makes me hate this thing so much?  Oh, let me count the ways.



First are the color choices.  Let’s say you want to camouflage a vehicle for the Arctic.  You put black on the nose of the vehicle that fades to white towards the rear.  Ok, so far, so good.  Then you decide on a color for the accents and weapons of the vehicle.  Hey, let’s pick BRIGHT RED.  THAT won’t stick out among the polar bears at all!



There’s more to the vehicles oddities besides the colors.  The first oddity is the cockpit itself.  The small front windshield has a frosted look to it, with a clear spot arced out by the windshield wiper.  I’ve always been a fan of this detail, ever since it was first used on the Snow Cat.  Its use here however, is questionable.  The windshield here is hardly worth having the detail, and the wiper just looks odd…especially with its bright red color.  Further, the cockpit has three openings around the driver’s head.  You would THINK that in the Arctic you would want the driver of your vehicle to stay as warm as possible…kind of hard to do that when the cockpit has several openings.  Also, wouldn’t the openings make a wiper necessary for the INSIDE?  Warm air from the heater mixed with freezing air from outside would make for plenty of condensation, I would think.



Another oddity is the way the Ice Cutter propels itself.  Instead of acting like tank treads, the Ice Cutter propels itself by using the blades on the sides to pull itself along.  One blade flops forward and the Cutter pulls itself forward for a certain distance, then the other side flops forward, and so on.  Kind of an odd way to move, but I guess it would work on ice.  The only bad thing about this design is that it limits the cutter to an icy environment.  At least other Arctic vehicles like the Snow Cat/Wolf Hound could still be used in other environments if necessary.



The Ice Cutter is armed with one double-barreled cannon.  The cannon is decently sized for the vehicle, and it can be moved into a multitude of positions to provide maximum firepower.  The only flaws with it are the long, thin barrels, as I can see them breaking off easily if the vehicle is handled roughly.

All of the vehicle’s flaws could be forgiven if it at least came with a decent or at least unique figure.  Well, not only is the figure included with the Ice Cutter one that we’ve gotten multiple times already, it’s the worst version of that figure yet.  The Ice Cutter comes with yet another 25th style Snow Serpent.  Unlike the TRU exclusive RoC version though, this one doesn’t come with a neat camo pattern.  In fact, his whole body is plain old gray.  The only spice added is that his boots, webgear, and goggles are all bright red.  Not only is this again a terrible Arctic color choice, it just looks terrible.  This figure just seems like a total give up.  "Well, this vehicle sucks, so we might as well get off as cheap as we can with the figure.  Good thing we have all these leftover unpainted Snow Serpents.  Throw some red on him and let's call it a day."



So, let’s recap here.  Odd color choices?  Strike one.  Poor overall design?  Strike two.  Terribly blah figure?  STRIKE THREE.  Pick this one up if you absolutely HAVE to have another Cobra Arctic vehicle or if you’re a PoC completist, or you like crappy Joe vehicles.  If not though, give this one a big, fat PASS.

Review – Pursuit of Cobra VAMP


The Highs:

1.  Vintage cues mixed into modern design
2.  Multiple configurations for accessories
3.  Can haul a ton of figures

The Lows: 

1.  Those cursed red axles
2.  Ammo belt on Gatling gun limits turret rotation
3.  Thumbwheel for winch in the middle of the hood

The Verdict:
One of the best new GI Joe vehicles in almost 30 years. 


The original VAMP is one of just about everybody’s favorite Joe vehicles.  The VAMP was one of those “just right” sized vehicles a Joe fan could take with him or her anywhere.  The large wheels and obvious off-road capability made it versatile enough for use in everything from an urban environment to the desert to the jungle.  It held two figures, and had some neat features like the removable gas tanks stored in a rack on the vehicle’s rear.  Hasbro has tried many times to recapture the magic of that original VAMP, some more successful than others.  There have been multiple variations of the original, from the Mark II to the Tiger Sting to the Desert Striker.  Even Cobra got its own version, the Stinger.  In the early 2000s, Hasbro tried to replace the VAMP in the Valor vs Venom and SpyTroops lines with versions of the very real Humvee.  Though neat (and a welcome change) the Hummers just didn’t seem “Joe” enough, though the DTC Night Ops Humvee came very close.  The 25th Anniversary line in 2008 gave us an updated version of the original.  Now, in 2010 we get an all-new VAMP as part of the Pursuit of Cobra line, and THIS, my friends, is the best VAMP ever, and in my opinion one of the best GI Joe vehicles in the past 25 years.





The PoC VAMP is a large, four-seat, four wheel drive vehicle.  It is primarily tan in color, with large black tires and a large black brush guard and winch on the front.  Like the original, the new VAMP has a turret mounted in the rear.  Further details include smoke grenade launchers mounted over the rear fenders, an antenna that can be moved to several locations, a rack on the rear with two removable, modern gas cans, and in a new addition, a spare tire mounted on the driver’s side of the rear.  There’s even an original-style tow hook on the back, a feature that I just LOVE.





Anybody can make a 4x4 with a turret in the back and call it a VAMP, but the designers threw in a lot of little cues that combine elements of all the original’s variations into a successful package that shows its heritage while still being ultra-modern.  First, the large brush guard on the front is reminiscent of both the Desert Striker and the Night Ops Hummer.  The slanted, boxy hood (with two oblong vents in the leading edge), the winch in the front, the square headlights, the rear turret, and the dual removable gas cans on the back are all direct nods to the original VAMP.  The roll cage’s shape (and the way it extends all the way to the rear) and the mounting points for weapons on the hood are further homages to the Desert Striker.  Finally, included are two black scorpion stickers that are dead ringers for the stickers on the sides of the Mark II.

All the nostalgic design cues in the world won’t make a vehicle a hit if the rest of the design is just so-so.  Well, that’s most definitely not the case here.  First, whoever designed the VAMP really knew 4-wheel drive vehicles.  The wheels are pushed out to the very corners of the body, which means the VAMP will be able to climb over obstacles more easily.  On the underside of the vehicle are front and rear skidplates that are attached near the middle of the body.  The skidplates serve as mounting points for the wheels and as a sort of independent suspension.  There’s even a 4x4 transfer case molded into the center of the underside!  Also, every 4x4er knows that the best way to ensure you can get out of just about any situation is to have a winch.  Well, the VAMP definitely has a big winch, and it has a HUGE claw on the front.  It could easily grab onto a Joe-scaled tree…or even another figure.  This claw is so huge it looks like it could latch on to a freaking redwood!  It’s perhaps a bit much…but it definitely works!  A thumbwheel in the middle of the hood reels the winch’s string back in. 




This vehicle has oodles and oodles of detail throughout.  The brush guard on the front has mirrors on the outside, little tow hooks down low, and KC-style off-road lights mounted just above the winch.  Moving back, the cockpit contains padding molded into the seatbacks, a moveable oblong steering wheel (that REALLY reminds me of the steering wheel in the old Super Powers Batmobile), grab handles to the outboard sides of the front seats to help the driver and passenger get in and out, and even a bunch of gauges molded into the dashboard to give it detail.  Taking internal detail to an insane level, there’s a shifter with a large, textured handle, a tray between the front and back seats that will hold the “demo” pouches included with several figures, and a cupholder!  The steps on the outside of the cockpit are diamond-plated, as is the floor in the turret area.  There are two, small steps on either side of the rear bumper to help with ingress and egress to the turret area.  One side of the turret area has a fuel filler on its edge, and the other side has a tie-down.  A removable sledgehammer and shovel fit into racks in front of the turret.  As for the turret itself, it’s tall and narrow, and attached to its own rotating circular platform.  A large ammo canister is attached to the driver’s side of the turret. 




The PoC VAMP is plenty well-armed.  First, there’s a weapon that I can best describe as a Barrett .50 caliber sniper rifle (minus a stock) mounted on a gyroscopic style mount.  While the rifle can be mounted in a number of places, it seems to make the most sense mounted in front of the passenger side, on the hood.  Next, is a minigun style weapon that can be mounted either on the turret or on one of the mounting points on the roof in front of the rear seats.  The minigun has an ammo belt that can be attached to the ammo canister, and the silver barrel can be rotated via a yellow knob between the grab handles on the rear.  Both the style of the gun, its mounting, and the style of the shield on the front are very reminiscent of the weapon on the back of HALO’s Warthog vehicle.  There is also a missile launcher that can be mounted either on the turret or the roof mounting points.  The missile launcher has one yellow missile that can be fired by pressing a button just in front of the shield.  Finally, though armed with a mounted .50 sniper rifle, a minigun, and a missile launcher, there’s plenty of opportunity for further VAMP armament by using the passenger spaces.  The open cockpit and easy roof access (due to the openings over the rear seats) mean that geared-up figures could easily stand or hang out all over the VAMP and pour out loads of punishment to either pursuers or the pursued. 





The new VAMP comes with a new version of Clutch, renamed Double-Clutch.  Built using 25th Snow-Job’s arms and legs and topped with 25th Clutch’s head, he comes outfitted with a .45 pistol, a satchel, a black removable vest, and a helmet that is a repaint of 25th Bazooka’s.  Double Clutch looks ok, but he’s kind of generic.  Honestly, I’m not going to spend a lot of time on the figure, because he’s pretty meh, in my opinion.  I’d rather throw 25th Clutch behind the driver’s seat than this guy.



The PoC VAMP seems like a “just-right” sized vehicle, and it is, but it makes the original VAMP look small by comparison.  Honestly, a better comparison would be the Rise of Cobra Steel Crusher.  They are similar in size and configuration, and seem like natural adversaries.  The Steel Crusher might be a little better in an urban environment, but the VAMP would definitely have the advantage off-road (even though the Crusher is still a Hummer). 







I love the PoC VAMP so much that I picked up a couple of them.  While I do army build Cobra vehicles, I usually don’t do so with Joe vehicles (though I may have many variations of the same vehicle, like I do with the original VAMP).  This is both because Joe vehicles are more numerous, and because I like to think of Joe vehicles as being unique and/or prototypes.  This particular vehicle pays homage to its past by combining styling cues from all its previous variations, and a few other vehicles like the Night Ops Hummer and the HALO Warthog.  Me buying multiples of the PoC VAMP was a rare thing for a Joe vehicle, but I like it that much.  Plus, I’ll be buying another one or two when the green one revealed at the 2011 JoeCon becomes available!

Due to the site issues the past week, I was unable to get the pics I took for the article in to (not into, as in my original post...I doubt Mike would have liked that! <!-- s:lol: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/roadpig_lol.gif" alt=":lol:" title="" /><!-- s:lol: --> ) Mike in time for publication.  So, here they are for further enjoyment...


Air Assault Glider:



RAM Cycle




Flight Pod




Jungle Terror

So, what the hell has been going on around here in my absence?  Sorry guys, my old computer finally went completely kaput on me...but now I'm typing to you on my brand-spanking-new Dell laptop that I got for Christmas!  Since my computer went down I'd cancelled my Internet service...no need to spend $40 a month on something you're not using and I just got hooked back up...but DAMN you have no idea how much you miss something until you don't have it anymore!  The only connection I had to the outside world was my iPhone with a limited data plan, so you have NO idea how good it feels to be back on the Net with no limitations...

Review – Armor Bot

The Highs:
1.  It’s friggin’ huge!
2.  Neat play features
3.  Heavily armed

The Lows:
1.  Not enough missiles to fill the spots for them
2.  Not a lot of articulation
3.  Electronic voice sounds are extremely corny

The Verdict:  Not a must have, but a nice piece for the price.


Well, since I’ve been in a Joe mech-reviewing mood this week, I figured I’d finish it up with a review of the granddaddy mech of them all…the 1993 GI Joe Armor Bot.  In the last years of the original line, Hasbro tried plenty of sub-teams to try and breathe some life back in the line and recapture that mid-80’s success.  Ninja Force, Eco-Warriors, Drug Elimination Force, Star Brigade…a lot of these teams are heavily derided by hardcore Joe fans, but every now and then, we’d still get some nice toys out of them.  The Armor Bot is one of them.  Hasbro also had a tradition of releasing one or two really big toys each year.  The General, Terror-Drome, Defiant, Rolling Thunder, and of course the mighty Flagg were all examples of this.  The Armor Bot was the last of the big Joe toys in the original line. 






The first thing you notice about the Armor Bot is that the thing is frigging huge.  It stands over a foot-and-a-half tall (almost 2 feet if you count the antennae) and the arms make it about a foot wide.  The body is primarily white, with the left arm, waist, cockpit canopy, and laser cannon all black, the rest of the weaponry blue, and the toy’s accents gold.  These colors aren’t too military, but considering this is supposed to be a sci-fi, space-faring toy, I’m not going to knock it for the color choices.  The feet are fused together, but have wheels in them so the Armor Bot can roll around easily.  The legs are setup in a reversed knee configuration, similar to the PoC Deviant or the Star Wars AT-ST “Chicken Walker.”  The right arm is a six barreled missile launcher, and the left arm is a giant, spring-loaded claw.  The head contains a two-seater cockpit, accessed by flipping up the forward “face” plate.  The Armor Bot has articulation in the hips, shoulders, waist, neck, and at the wrist of the arm with the claw.  It’s decently articulated, but not tremendously.  I wish the legs were more articulated and could be moved independent of each other.  There’s also a large handle on the back of the Armor Bot for easy transport and handling during play.  The handle’s kind of awkward-looking, but it doesn’t look too bad. 



The big Armor Bot also has BIG firepower.  As previously mentioned, the right arm is a giant, six-barreled missile launcher.  Pushing down a black, spring-loaded tab near the arm’s elbow fires a missile and cycles the gun to the next missile.  It works well, but I worry about the long-term durability of that tab, as I can see it breaking.  Besides the fact that the right arm is just a giant missile launcher, there’s plenty of other armament as well.  The feet contain four spots for missile storage, and the chest has spots for a whopping eight.  The only problem is that the Armor Bot doesn’t come with enough missiles to fill all the spots.  If you unload the launcher on the arm, you can, but otherwise you’re limited to having six in the launcher and six on the chest, which looks kind of goofy.  Also, if you put the missiles in the spots on the feet, they stick out way too far.  I ended up buying two more missiles off eBay so that I could have a fully loaded arm and all 8 spots in the chest filled. 





There are still more weapons here, though.  The AB’s “chin” has a large, black laser cannon attached to it, which can be rotated from side to side and raised up and down.  The right side of the head/cockpit has both a single and double-barreled cannon, and a large quad-barreled cannon dominates the left side of the head.  All three guns on the head can be moved up or down so they can engage targets individually.



There are other play features here, too.  The left arm has a spring-loaded claw that can easily grab a figure, or be used to tear off a piece of the vehicle.  In a somewhat strange feature, the three gold “fingers” can be pushed back and locked, and pushing a small button on top of them makes them spring forward.  I don’t know why this is here, because they don’t snap forward very far.  The “waist” section of the Armor Bot is really a battery box with a built-in speaker.  There are two buttons on the back of the box, accessed from the Armor Bot’s rear.  Pushing the right-hand button makes a laser firing sound, and a red light in the laser cannon on the Bot’s chin flashes in time to the sound.  The left button activates five voice commands, in a cheesy, robotic-sounding voice.  The Armor Bot says, in order, “Check Laser,” “Fire Laser,” “Check Armor,” “You’re dogmeat, Cobra!” and, in one of the cheesiest sounds to ever come out of a toy, “Let’s kick Bot!”  MAN, that is so cheesy it should be on a pizza!





The Armor Bot’s huge and it’s got some neat features, but it’s far from perfect. Besides the lack of enough missiles, lack of articulation, and the corny-assed sounds, there are a few other problems.  I don’t like the orange hose that runs from the back of the Armor BotThe stickers are kind of fragile, and they’re those crappy old paper ones.  When I was applying them, several of them had some colors smear.  Fortunately, CobraStickers has replacements available, but they’re a whopping $15 a set.  Finally, there are two platforms on each foot with space for figures…but why would any Joes want to ride on the robot’s feet? 

The Armor Bot is a massive toy, but it won’t cost you massive bucks.  You can still find these, MIB, from around $50-80 depending on where you look.  I believe that a large amount of these were clearanced out when the original Joe line went down the tubes, and collectors took advantage back then by snapping them up for next to nothing.  I personally remember a ton of these on the clearance aisles at Wal-Mart and Kay Bee Toys. That’s why MIB examples aren’t exactly rare.  If you want a loose Armor Bot, plan on paying around $25-30, though you might be surprised how reasonably you can get one off eBay…not counting shipping, of course.  All in all, the Armor Bot isn’t one of those must-have giant Joe toys…but it’s not bad for the price!